Love Hater
by Fantastical Chaos
Summary: Sequel to Love Fighter. I can't say I ever understood the depths to the lives of others. For so long I had believed that what we saw in everyone was what we got. Little did I know how wrong I was.
1. Part 1

**Disclaimer: I in no way, shape, or form own Vocaloid. Each character used belongs to the respective company that produced him/her; I merely borrowed them for non-profit entertainment purposes. The Hatsune Miku song Streaming Heart, of which this fanfic is based, belongs to DECO*27. Please give credit to him and check out the original song. It's amazing.** **Regardless, I do claim ownership to the cover art and words below. Please enjoy.**

* * *

 **I can't say I ever understood the depths to the lives of others.**

 **For so long I had believed that what we saw in everyone was what we got; every person I knew was just as put together as they appeared in public.**

 **Little did I know how wrong I was.**

"Wait, stop!" I shouted, but there were none to hear it. Love Makers screamed and ran as another gun shot pierced the morning air. Love Wreckers were crying out to tell whoever was shooting at the crowd to come out and fight. Len and his friend - Miku, I believed was her name - continued to run even as I called after them.

Realizing they were not going to stop and wait, I allowed the adrenaline and self-preservation instincts to kick in. It really would have sucked if my childhood friend died, but there was no way I was going to go down without doing something to save myself. If Len wanted to run and drag that girl along with him, then he was on his own.

I jumped to my feet - I had knocked Len and Miku over when I saw a large arrow coming for them and had yet to get back up at that point - and ran to the nearest store: a bakery. Instead of going inside like many other Love Makers, I ran behind the building and scaled the ladder of the fire escape. When I reached the top, I pulled out my pocket knife. As I looked around, I saw I wasn't the only one who took this course of action. The only difference between me and the others was I was the only one who wore white.

There was a Love Wrecker on the bakery roof with me. She scanned me, saw that I was serious, and nodded her head as a form of respect. No other Love Maker would do what I was doing, and that was enough to keep the Love Wrecker from telling me to get lost.

We each began to look around, searching for whatever it was we were after. I saw the pillar just in time to see Len pull Miku through the portal. Now that my concern for his safety no longer had reason to exist, I began to scan the rooftops. It was up on the clock tower just an arm's throw away from the bakery that I noticed a rogue Love Wrecker shooting at the pillar, a bow and quiver of arrows slung over his back and agitation clearly written on his face.

"There!" I pointed at him for the Love Wrecker, and when she noticed, she shot at him.

The rogue dodged the bullet and made to retreat. I jogged closer to him before throwing my knife. He was hit in the leg, and it was enough for him to crumple down and slide to the alley below.

"You missed him!" the Love Wrecker shouted, her accent British. She must have been visiting the area, which would explain why I didn't know her.

"I hit exactly where I was aiming," I told her. "We shouldn't hit to kill, especially if we don't know why there was an attack. Don't you think we should figure out why he shot at all those people before we kill him?"

Just then another gunshot echoed, making me jump. I looked over to see a Love Wrecker standing over the corpse of our attacker. Putting his gun away, the Love Wrecker looked at us before giving a thumbs up.

"Seems he didn't think so," was how the British Love Wrecker replied to me.

She and I both made descended the bakery, and some other Love Wreckers approached the body as well. The sight of my switch blade in the deceased's leg made my stomach churn, but I pushed it aside. I wasn't glad that he was dead: I hated that I played a told in this guy's death. However, I was grateful that no more innocents would be hurt. Soon enough the Love Makers would come out and tend to the wounded. I prayed we wouldn't lose anyone to this incident.

"I've never seen him before in my life," the Love Wrecker who killed the rogue said. He also had a British accent. "What do you think, Rui?"

Rui, the Love Wrecker on the roof with me, bent down and looked the rogue hard in the face. "I know him," she said finally. "His sister is my brother's partner. His name's Rinto."

I almost apologized, but I caught myself. The relation wouldn't matter to Rui. She didn't care if Rinto lived or died, nor did she care how his sister would react to the news. Heck, Rui probably wouldn't give a rat's hat if her brother had any feelings over what just happened. It wasn't that Rui is heartless: she's just a Love Wrecker.

"Better not leave this in there." Without blinking, the male Love Wrecker pulled out my knife and wiped the blade against his pants. "I don't suppose this is yours."

Rui pointed at me. "It's his. You should have seen it, Zeito. This Love Maker has some wicked aim."

Taking me in, Zeito looked dubious. "A Love Maker who will injured another? Now I've seen everything." He handed the pocket knife to me, which I accepted because he had cleaned off the blood. I don't think I could have taken it back otherwise. "So it's possible for your kind to fight after all," he said. Our police are never Love Makers, just Love Wreckers. If I could fight, it was strictly self-taught.

"Only those of us who don't want to be hopeless in situations such as this," I replied. It was then I noticed a tiny figure slowly approaching the scene. I would have thought nothing of it had it not been for the fact she was trembling where she stood.

"Rin!" I called out as I ran towards her, foolish because I still held my knife in my hand. "Rin, are you all right? Were you hit?"

I noticed that Rin tightly clutched her right arm, blood pooling from an over her elbow and seeping through her fingers. Rin was hit all right, but she was also fine. Based on how little she reacted, this was just a scratch to her. Because it was the smart decision, I didn't ask if she wanted help cleaning her wound. "It'll stop bleeding eventually," she would say whenever she cut herself while we were children, "and after that you just slap a band aid on it. No big deal."

"He's with her," Rin whispered. Physically she was fine, but I wasn't about to get my hopes up for her emotional state. Not yet. "He shouldn't be with her. Why's he with her?"

"Who shouldn't be with whom?" I asked, speaking softly.

With a shake of her head, Rin answered, "Len shouldn't be with that girl. She shouldn't even be here. It's not possible."

Then she collapsed. I grabbed her uninjured arm to keep her from falling to the ground. Regaining her balance, Rin shook me off as she said, "Let me go, Nero. I'm all right."

"Rin, what's going on?" I asked. "Why shouldn't Len let be with Miku?"

Sighing, Rin answered, "Long story."

"I don't know what this shooting practice was about," Zeito said, approaching Rin and me while Rui followed close behind, "but he wasn't the only one. His angle didn't give him much area to cover, and there are people out of what was his reach hurt."

"Either the others took off after your excellent aim took out their ally," Rui said – Love Wreckers never associated with others as "friends," just allies – "or they lost their target and went chasing after it."

This information made Rin catch her breath. If I didn't know her so well from having grown up nearly side-by-side, I wouldn't have caught this little action. In an instant, I understood.

Len shouldn't have been with Miku, according to Rin.

Len and Miku went through the portal.

The rogue Love Wreckers disappeared shortly after Len and Miku left.

Something was up, and Rin knew it. She may have not known everything, but she knew something. I wondered how hard I would have to try to get her to tell me what was going on, and with how stubborn Rin is, I would have to try very, very hard.

"Any ideas why this pocket of all Love Worlds would be attacked?" Zeito asked. "Is there an alliance issue we need to know about? There's one between the British and French pockets that's coming close to war, that's why we're here, for safety. I wonder if this is over something similar."

"No issues that I know of," I answered. Rin still shook by my side, her blood still pouring at a rate I didn't like. "There haven't been any big disagreements in recent years, and everyone's happy. Whatever this shooting was about has nothing to do with alliances and more with specific targets." _Like Len and his out-of-town friend._

"Then let's hope they don't come back," Rui said. By this time the other Love Wreckers have completely lost interest. With the exception of Rui and Zeito, they have all left the scene in favor of more entertaining activities. Solving a mystery just wasn't important to them, I supposed. "Things like this just don't happen, not in the Love World," Rui went on to say. "If there's a problem that has nothing to do with alliances between respected pockets, then it has to mean that the Streamers are involved."

"What do you know about the Streamers?" Rin asked, returning to us. She still clutched her arm, but the bleeding began to subside, much to my relief.

"It's what our alliance over in Europe is about," Zeito answered. "The French pocket want to accept Streamers into Europe's Love World society, but our pocket won't have it. They refuse to have mutts treated as equals, let alone have them become citizens."

"We want to keep our blood pure," Rui added. "The sooner we accept Streamers as one of us, the sooner we will start having each other as partners and soil ourselves."

"But Streamers can't reproduce," Rin pointed out. "There's no reason to worry about ruining 'pure blood' because there won't be mixed blood offspring to be had. Nothing's going to change."

Rui shrugged a single shoulder. "If there's one stereotype I agree with, it's that we are an arrogant people. Of course, every groups have people has their flaws. Zeito and I came here of all places because it's a small pocket. Nothing of significance ever happens in a small pocket, or that's what we believed until today. . . ."

Neither Rin nor I had a comment to that. Something more was going on, and I knew we had to figure it out. Turning to Rin, I asked, "May I walk you home?"

A "no" was on her lips, but it faded away when she saw that I knew what that rogue Love Wrecker was trying to shoot. She knew I was aware that this had to do with Len, and she knew me well enough to know that I was not going to stop bugging her until she at least told me something. Though with clear reluctance, Rin answered, "Yes, please."

"Be careful," Zeito said as Rin and I showed that we intended to leave. "Brave Love Makers like you are as good as a myth. I'd hate to lose one."

"Will do," I replied before telling them farewell. As Rin and I left, I heard Rui whisper something that made me tense so tightly it was a miracle I was able to still keep walking.

"I think that's the girl," she told Zeito. "The one we're looking for."

If she heard that, Rin didn't let on. We just kept with the walk to her home, side-by-side but never interacting. There was nothing to be said, or at least nothing in a public place like that. It was an unspoken agreement to wait until we had gotten somewhere private, and if Zeito and Rui were looking for Rin, then I would do everything I could to keep them from hearing anything that might confirm their suspicions. If the shooting had to do with Len, then Rin was a target, and I was not about to leave Rin clueless and unprotected.

When we entered Rin's home, I was surprised to see that the only furniture in her living room was a wooden stool, a base holding a canvas, and a small desk. Paints of many colors stained the furniture, floors, and walls. Scattered throughout were paintings – paintings of landscapes, animals, and even people. I tried not to stare at any of the faces for too long: they made me uncomfortable for reasons I couldn't pinpoint.

Rin didn't argue as I peeled her hand away from her bullet wound in order to inspect the damage. "Bowls are under the sink," she said, knowing that my next course of action would be to get a bowl of hot water and a fresh, clean towel. "Is there anything I can do to help?" she questioned as I made my way to her kitchen.

"Sit still so you don't risk opening the wound up again," I ordered. Rin's silence acted as a promise to comply. It made me worry.

As I cleaned off the dry, caked blood, I told Rin, "I know that whatever happened today involves Len." She didn't react; Rin must have expected my saying that. "Do you have any idea why that may be?"

"I wish I did," Rin replied. If my scrubbing her wound hurt, she didn't let on.

"You said that Len shouldn't have been with Miku."

"More like Miku shouldn't have been here." Rin shook her head. "Why Len thought it to be a good idea to bring a human to the Love World, I could never guess."

I froze mid-motion. "Miku's a human?!"

"Yes, or I thought she is. I don't even know what's going on anymore."

For the next half hour, I cleaned Rin's wound in silence. Maybe she lied because she didn't think what was going on was any of my business, or maybe she was being perfectly honest with me for once. Truly, there was no way of knowing with her.

After I had bandaged the wound and Rin thanked me for tending to her, I said, "We need to do something. Whatever Len has gotten himself involved with, it's serious."

"Really? By the shooting that happened in the marketplace, I wasn't sure if this was a minor issue or not." I snorted: this sounded more like Rin. "And what's with this 'we' business?" she asked. "Nero, this doesn't involve you."

"Len's my friend, and you're his sister," I answered. "I would have to be a pretty terrible person to not do anything to help."

"You can help by not sticking your nose where it doesn't belong." Rin stood and, arms crossed, walked across the room. "I have enough to worry about as it is. There's no point in adding you to the mix."

Standing as well, I pointed out, "I'm very much capable of taking care of myself, thank you very much. Besides, something big must be going on if you're acting so droopy. You haven't sounded much like yourself in the past few weeks. Are you sure you're okay?"

"I've long ago accepted the fact that I'm never okay."

That wasn't exactly a nice thing to hear.

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"I don't know."

Without anything else to say, I told Rin, "You remember those two from earlier? Zeito and Rui? I think . . . I think they're looking for you."

"I know. I heard every word."

What unnerved me was how calmly Rin had said that. "Aren't you going to try to get away and hide while there's still a chance?"

Laughing without humor, Rin replied, "Of course not."

"What?!" I felt my eyes bulge. "Why?"

"If Len has himself caught up in something, then maybe they can help me figure out what."

I shook my head. "This could be suicide."

"That's a risk I'm willing to take."

"Not me."

"Then go. I'm not asking you to put your life on the line."

"Not my life. Yours." Before Rin could ask what I meant, I explained, "I'm not willing for you to risk your life, or at least not alone. If you're going to go through with this madness, then I'm in."

This time Rin snorted. "You really amuse me sometimes."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Only if you see it that way."

* * *

 **How many times did someone tell me "I'm okay" when their world was falling apart?**

 **How often did someone smile to hide the pain they felt?**

 **How long did someone suffer in my presence and I never noticed?**

 **I couldn't believe how blind I was.**

 **I couldn't believe that I never stopped to think that maybe there is more to someone than what initially meets the eye.**

For someone who anticipated abduction, Rin was rather calm and relaxed. She got on with the rest of day as if nothing was wrong in her world. The only emotion she displayed that showed she hadn't forgotten her predicament was frustration that her kidnappers were taking too long to show up.

It was decided that I would go with her. As much as Rin told me that I was stupid for putting my life on the line over something that didn't concern me, she didn't talk me out of trying to get myself kidnapped as well. Good thing, too. I couldn't abandon her even if she told me to; I just didn't have it in me to even think of doing such a thing.

Why she wasn't more persistent in getting me to go away before things came crashing down, I don't know. Maybe with everything else she had to deal with, Rin didn't want to put in the energy for talking me out of helping her. I liked to think she didn't want to be alone and was willing to accept my presence as the price to pay. Odds are it was the former.

When somebody finally came for Rin, it was neither a big sneak attack nor a full-out attack like the shooting the day before. No. When someone came for Rin, they knocked on her door and patiently awaited an answer. Rin raised an eyebrow at me when we heard the knock. I shrugged. Neither one of us knew what to expect, but we expected the worst. Imagine our shock when Rin and I stepped outside to fine Rui and Zeito waiting a decent distance away.

"I know this is unexpected," Rui began, unaware how wrong she was, "but we need you to come with us. Rin Kagamine, we know what you are, what you're brother is, and what's happening to him."

Without so much as a hitch in her voice, Rin merely said, "Okay," and began to approach the duo.

They cast each other side glances. "You're going to come with us, just like that?"

Rin didn't blink as she stopped in her steps. "Yep."

"Even though you have no idea who we are and could be walking to your death for all you know?"

"Yep."

"And you're not just coming along willingly so we'll think we can trust you and when we least expect it you will attack and maybe kill us before fleeing for your life."

"Now that's actually not a bad idea."

Rui cut in. "We're wasting time. Rin Kagamine, are you really going to come with Zeito and me regardless of the nonexistent trust between you and us?"

"Look," Rin began, "I can run and cry 'You'll never take me alive'" - Rin mocked a jazz hands as she said this, almost making laugh despite the situation - "but the fact of the matter is I won't know what's going on unless I understand what you're collecting me for. Given my circumstances, it'd be stupid to run. However, try something and it won't end well for you." Here Rin held a hand behind her back so that only I could see what she did with her fingers. With the rest curled, Rin stuck out her thumb and pointed her index finger to the ground. I immediately understood the sign.

Pressing her lips together, Rui merely said, "Then I suppose we should get going." She and Zeito led the way, and Rin and I followed close behind. When she noticed that I was coming with, Rui kept walking as she said, "This does not require your presence."

"I'm going, and that's that." I hoped I sounded confident and that there was no room for arguments. If I wasn't wanted, I feared what they would do to make sure I couldn't follow.

"It's pointless for you to come," Zeito said.

"Which is exactly what I tried to tell him," Rin replied, "but he's insisted that wherever I go, he goes, and I'm not going to fight him on it."

Silence, and then, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you two are partners."

My face might as well have caught fire. Rin made a strangling noise before shouting, "We're not partners! Nothing of the sort has ever existed between us."

I almost pointed out that Rin kissed me in our physical forms some months back, but then I decided I liked living. "I'm just childhood friends with her brother," I said instead. "If there's anything I can do to help Len, then I'm going to do it."

Sighing, Rui told Zeito, "We've wasted enough time as it is; might as well let him come. With everything going on, I doubt Tonio would be against Rin's having something familiar to cling to."

"I'm not clingy," Rin growled, but none of us acted as if we heard her. Rui and Zeito began to lead the way, and Rin and I followed after. I could have been making a mistake. I probably should have turned around and left Rin on her own. But I didn't. I couldn't. Why couldn't I?

Zeito looked me up and down as we continued our trek forward. "Normally I'd be against having a Love Maker join us, but your willingness to put yourself in danger yesterday to find the shooters is enough for me to give you a chance. If you fail to be as brave as you initially appeared, I'm going to be very disappointed."

He said the last part as if I did not want to disappoint him. Maybe I didn't. "Running and hiding is not always the best decision when things get scary. Sometimes staying to fight is the best choice."

"Only sometimes?"

"It's pointless to risk your life when there are no benefits to be had, isn't it?"

"It is," Rin said, forcing herself into the conversation. "Before you choose to either fight or flight, it's wise to weigh your options. If you choose to run, that doesn't make you a coward. One might run to strategize and retaliate in a fight they might actually have a chance of winning."

"You lose the thrill of uncertainty if you take that course of action," Zeito said. "I'd rather stay, fight, and suffer the losses if I fail."

"Then you are a fool," Rin replied.

"How about when there are no chances to retaliate?" I asked, hoping Rin would understand what I was really asking.

She did. "Cut your losses and save yourself." she answered. "Some battles are not worth fighting, especially those that aren't your own."

Before Zeito or I could respond, Rui stopped us by saying, "Now's the time, Zeito. There aren't any witnesses."

My body went rigid. We walked back to the marketplace, but we stopped in an alley. As Rui pointed out, there was nobody else present. I immediately evaluated our setting: There were two of us and two of them - a man and woman each, a simple scream would be enough to attract attention, and Rin and I were both armed, but that didn't mean Zeito and Rui weren't. Zeito noticed my internal calculations, and I know he did because he then said, "We needed a private place to use our portal box. We can't go around activating this thing in public, y'know."

While Zeito said this, Rui produced a small black box from her pocket. She gently bent down to set the item on the ground and then pushed the center button. A light blue glow emitted from around the button, slightly illuminating the alley in which we stood.

"It has to warm up," she said as she stood up again. To Rin and me, "We can't take the main portal - it'll be easy for them to track us if we use public transportation."

"Who's 'them'?" Rin asked.

"And why would they be tracking us?" I added.

"'Them' are the people who have Len Kagamine," Zeito answered, "and they won't be tracking us. They'll be tracking Rin Kagamine."

"To use against Len, no doubt," Rin mumbled, her fingers curling into tight fists. She didn't miss the part about these mysterious people having her brother, and I know Rin well enough to not doubt that she would claw out the eyes of anyone who dare touch Len.

With nothing else to do but wait for the portal box - an object I have never seen before that day - to warm up, I looked at Rin and said, "I'm not changing my mine, but I have to know: What exactly am I getting myself into?"

Rin didn't say anything. She just shook her head. For reasons I wouldn't understand for another hour, Rin would be unable to speak the truth. Looking back, I don't blame her.

"Who are you really?" Rin asked the two before us. Her fingers had yet to uncurl. I wanted to reach out, take her hand, and massage her chalk white fingers.

"We really are European refugees," Rui answered, "but the main reason we came to this specific Love World was to find you."

"We . . . We know what you truly are," Zeito added. "Try as you and Len might, your secret was never a secret. We always knew, that's why your brother is in his situation, and that's why we have to move you to a safe location before they get you, too."

For a moment nobody said anything. All there was to be heard was the buzzing from the charging portal box. I didn't trust that thing, but I didn't try to get away from it.

Finally Rin sighed and replied, "I feared as much." She shook her head. "I am so stupid to endanger Len like this. Of course this is happening! I damned us both from the start." Under her breath, perhaps not to be heard, Rin whispered, "We should have run away when Len first suggested it. We might have had a chance in a place as vibrant and in motion as the human world."

I couldn't understand what they were talking about. For as long as I have known them, Rin and Len weren't that different from other Love Makers and Love Wreckers. Sure, they got along better than most of us got along with our siblings, but nobody thought much of it. How was I supposed to know that there was a lot more going on?

"It's ready," Rui said, forcing our attention back to the portal box. She knelt down and pushed the same button. This time a portal opened above the box. Rui smiled at it. "I'll go first," she announced before diving head in. She disappeared into the light, and I felt my stomach drop.

"Better not keep Rui waiting," Zeito said. "The portal box will self-destruct in precisely one minute, so it'd be better if you don't wait to jump in."

"No problem," Rin replied. When she stepped forward, I stopped her by grabbing her arm. "What are you doing?" she snapped at me.

"Just let me go with you," I replied softly.

Recalling past events, Rin shook free from my grip so that she could take my hand. She almost never acted so soft, but in moments like this, it was easy to see that she truly is a kind soul. "Now let's go," she said as she pulled me along.

Swallowing my fear, I let Rin pull me into the terrifying portal. Neither of us knew where we would end up. We were probably making a mistake, but we went in anyway. This was something we had to do, and we were going in together.


	2. Part 2

**When you see someone cry, your entire vision of them changes forever.**

 **Their fragility becomes evident. Their will appears stronger.**

 **Those who cry aren't always weak; sometimes they're the bravest people in the world.**

I thought someone is calling my name, but I couldn't be sure. The sound was muffled. It was as if someone is trying to talk to me while we were both underwater.

Then I heard her. "Nero? Nero, are you okay?"

"Does this always happen when he travels through a portal?" asked another voice.

"Always," the first answered. "Nero has really bad portal sickness. He's been this way ever since we were kids."

"Good thing you held onto him as you both entered the portal," came a third speaker. "If you weren't there to catch him, his skull would've cracked wide open on the concrete floor."

"That's not funny, Zeito."

"I'm just being real."

"Well how about you shut up and let me see if I can wake Nero up," the first speaker snapped. Then she spoke softly, addressing me. "Nero, can you hear me? Show me that you can hear me." I moaned. She sighed. "Can you open your eyes?"

I moaned as a way to answer _no_. If I opened my eyes, everything would start spinning. Spinning, spinning, spinning. Very soon I would be sick enough to vomit. All of that could be avoided if I just kept my eyes closed.

However, my caretaker was persistent. "I will leave you here if you don't comply, Nero. Don't think I won't."

Rin always had a way of comforting others. Especially me.

Very, very slowly, I peeled open my eyes. I only opened them halfway, in hopes that the spinning wouldn't be so bad. Narrowed blue eyes met mine. My body was shaken.

"All the way," Rin ordered. "You'll be fine, Nero. Just trust me."

I did not, in fact, trust Rin. However, doing as she says is far better than ignoring her.

When Rin's whole face entered my line of sight, I locked eyes with Rin in attempt to keep the inevitable spinning from taking place and kept my focus planted on her orbs. As much as everything around me tumbled, I would be fine as long as I maintained eye contact. I should be fine as long as I kept my eyes on the girl before me.

"Very good," Rin said, her words soft. "Keep looking at me. It will all be over soon."

"That's what you say to something before you kill it."

"Shut up, Zeito," Rui snapped. I had forgotten about those two. "We're in no rush. Let Rin do whatever she has to do to help Nero feel better."

For minutes that felt like days, I stared into Rin's eyes. She's always had pretty eyes, not that I would ever tell her that. When the roll of nausea faded, I forced myself to sit upright. I tilted and wobbled, but I held myself up fine enough. It was in this position I realized that while I lied down, my head was on Rin's lap.

Never once had Rin done something like that. I supposed she was putting on a show for Zeito and Rui, but thinking about it now, it doesn't make sense. There was no reason for Rin to want to influence what the two thought about her. Rin typically never cares what anyone thinks about her.

"Feel better?" Rin asked. My answer was a nod. "Then let's go."

We got to our feet and followed our new Love Wrecker friends. Now that I felt better, I realized that we were inside a garden. Roses of white, pink, and baby blue trapped us in a cage of branches. The leaves were so thick that it seemed as if the only break from green we got was in the petals themselves. It was as beautiful as it was eerie.

"Where are we?" I asked, my eyes darting from scenery to scenery, desperately trying to find something of difference within this maze.

"Just outside our headquarters," Rui answered without turning around. "I set the portal for the rose garden. Although inside Tonio's office would have been optimal, I really wanted to see the flowers and didn't have it in me to wait."

Her response surprised me. I have never heard a Love Wrecker admit to liking flowers. If anything, they usually scolded the flora. Eventually I started to believe that all Love Wreckers hated flowers, sunsets, and just beautiful things in general. My sister was no exception. Until I saw Rin's paintings the day before, I didn't think Rin was any different.

After ten minutes of walking through the garden, we came to a mahogany door that had no special look to it. What sat before us was a simple wooden door with a plain bronze doorknob and scratches of wear etched into the wood. The frame, on the other hand, was made of iron. Standing around the frame was a concrete wall, white with paint peeling all over. Windows with bars were placed on either side. I couldn't see where the building ended or how high it went. I didn't know if I stood before a cottage or an edifice. The rose bushes were too thick for me to gather that information without taking the opportunity to investigate.

"Zeito," Rui began, patting down her sides, "do you have your key? I think I misplaced mine during that shooting."

"You're kidding, right?" was how Zeito replied. "I lost mine ages ago. I didn't say anything because I'd think you would at least have yours."

Rui swore under her breath. "Well, no harm in knocking, I suppose."

While we waited for an answer, I looked to Rin and whispered, "Are you still okay with this?"

"What other choice do I have? Len's in trouble, and I don't have ways to help him at my disposal." Rin sighed. "I hate this so much. If I could have anything in the world right now, it would be to go back before all of this began. What's happening now is a nightmare I'm afraid I won't be waking up from any time soon."

I wanted to say something to that, but what could I say? It's really irritating when you want to help someone but you don't know what to do or where to begin. So badly I wanted to help Rin with what she was facing, yet there wasn't anything I could do except be there for her. I hoped that in and of itself would be enough.

If either Zeito or Rui heard us, they didn't let on. I'm not stupid enough to think that every exchange Rin and I had was strictly between us, but I was glad for the false sense of privacy. At least that was something we could have.

"Did you lose your keys again?" was the first thing we heard when the door was opened. Rin's jaw fell open with a pop of surprise. When I saw who answered the door, I did the same.

Turquoise hair that was neatly cut close to the head, crystal blue eyes that hid behind a pair of gray glasses, a thin body mixed with a short stature - I had seen these traits before. However, these same traits I saw belonged to a woman, not a man. Yet here he was, the exact genderbend of the girl I met the day before.

"Not possible," Rin blurted. "Why do you look so much like-?" She cut herself off, unable to say the words.

Except the man knew what she was going to ask. He looked at Zeito and Rui as if asking their permission, and when both nodded, he again looked at me and Rin. Giving us a sheepish smile - a smile I had seen before - he introduced himself. "My name is Mikuo, and I'm a Love Maker. Sorry if my appearance is so shocking to you. Unfortunately, I look way too much like my sister."

* * *

 **If we're being completely honest with ourselves, we all have something to hide. Every one of us has a secret we plan to take to our graves. Even the most open have things they keep hidden away in their heart.**

 **Maybe it's a never-ending hurt.**

 **Maybe it's an unrequited love.**

 **Maybe it's a dark, dreadful secret.**

 **Whatever it may be, we all have that secret. This was something I never knew until I realized what it was I kept hidden in a dark corner.**

Perhaps if I had known ahead of time that Miku was a Love Wrecker, then learning that she had a brother would not have been so shocking. We're always born in sets of two, so it wasn't until Rin mistakenly informed me that Miku was human that the possibility of Miku having a brother no longer concerned me. I knew nothing about Miku beforehand, and I don't know if that made this new information concerning her easier or harder to learn. Finding out that Miku is actually a Love Wrecker through the existence of her Love Maker brother really put what I thought I knew about Miku to a crashing end. I decided to keep this to myself because Rin spent the next hour occasionally knocking herself on the head and mumbling "of course, of course" over and over.

"What I want to know is," I began, "how are you here? And do you know what you are if Miku doesn't know what she is?"

The five of us were in a small room with blue walls and a dirty white carpet. We sat on a couple of old couches, and a rocky coffee table stood in the middle of our circle. Glasses of lemonade dotted the surface, but nobody reached for a glass. Since the person we were supposed to speak to was away at the moment, we decided to get to know Mikuo while we awaited the other guy's return.

"I didn't know what I was until about six months ago," Mikuo said, staring off into the distance. _Does he think he's in a soap opera or something? Or he is just dramatic?_ I remember thinking. "Then one day, while I was in this old diner, I was approached by this man I've never seen before. I was . . . not in a very good place. He sat with me and began to talk with me, asking questions and trying to figure out where I was going in life. 'Look, man,' I said to him, 'I don't know what drugs you're offering, but I'm not interested.' All the guy did was laugh and say, 'Relax, Mikuo, I'm not offering you any drugs.' 'How do you know my name?' I asked. I knew without a fact that I didn't introduce myself to this stranger. He answered, 'I know more about you than you know about yourself.'"

"Because there's nothing creepy about that at all," Rin mumbled.

Laughing, Mikuo replied, "You got that right, Rin. Long story short, it took him ages to convince me that he was legit. Once I trusted him, and he knew I would believe what he would tell me, he revealed everything he knew about me. Like he said, it was all stuff I didn't even know about myself."

"Who is he, anyway?" I asked. "People who aren't named is a red flag in my mind."

"Good catch," Rui answered. "'He' is the person we're waiting for."

"His name is Tonio," Zeito supplied. "He's the leader of this society."

"And what kind of society is this?" Rin questioned. "I'm not joining any cults."

"If that's all you're worried about, then there's no reason to fear." Mikuo grinned. "All will be explained when he arrives."

Wanting to draw the attention back to our previous subject, I said, "But what about you? What did Tonio know about you that you didn't know about yourself?"

Mikuo leaned back on the couch and took a deep breath. "What I did know was that I'm adopted. What I didn't know is that my parents are – _were_ Love Makers, I have a twin sister, and that I'm not human.

"When I was born, Miku and I were kidnapped, separated, and taken to the human world to be adopted by human parents. We were . . . We were part of an observational experiment, to see what would happen if a Love Maker and a Love Wrecker were raised by humans."

"Nature versus nurture," Rin mumbled.

"Exactly, Mikuo replied, "and that's where you and Len come in."

It is at this point Rin stiffens. Everything she said from here sounded as if she was forcing herself to make noise and pretend that nothing's amiss. She did an excellent job of this act, too. Neither Mikuo, Rui, nor Zeito let on that they realized Rin was pretending to not be concerned with what's about to come. As we shifted the conversation to what had been going on with Rui and Zeito since they left their Love World pocket, Rin still maintained her rigid posture. When I got the chance, I asked her with my eyes if she was all right. Ever so subtly, she shook her head. Had the space not been so small and my action would have gone unnoticed, I would have reached out and touched Rin's hand.

Hours passed by both too fast and painstakingly slow. Still Tonio had not arrived. However, that might have been the plan from the start. You know, give Rin and me a chance to get to know Mikuo, Rui, and Zeito and make us think we have friends here. Maybe those three really wanted to be our friends, but no amount of openness would convince me to let my guard down. I was hyper aware of every little thing – Mikuo's awkwardness at trying to figure out where to put his long limbs in the small space, the way the corner of Zeito's mouth lifted a little whenever he annoyed Rui, how often Rui ran her hands through her hair, and every instance Rin would scan the room as if checking for a threat just waiting for her to get careless and to stop keeping herself prepared to fight or flight.

Finally, Rui stood and said, "It's nearly time for dinner. Boys, why don't you help Nero get cleaned up while Rin and I freshen up ourselves?"

"I can clean myself without help just fine, thank you very much," I said, not sure what to think of Rin and my being separated. Sure, she and I could take care of ourselves just fine, but it's better to know that when things go from bad to worse, you can at least count on someone to watch your back.

Unlike my scaredy-cat self, Rin had no problem voicing her thoughts. "Why do we have to split apart to freshen up? Would you prefer Nero and me to be separated?"

"Well, you did say that you and Nero aren't partners," Zeito said. "Do you really want to share a bathroom with the guy you're not with?"

My face began to burn, but Rin didn't look daunted. "Whatever," she said, "but keep in mind that I'm watching you all. I refuse to go down without a fight."

"Of course, Rin," Rui replied, speaking softly. "The girls and boys respective toliets are twenty yards from each other. You won't be that far away from Nero while you shower and change into something nicer." Rui must have understood what a stressful situation Rin was in; Rin had no reason to trust anyone, and it's hard to earn the trust of someone who is expecting you to turn on them at any moment.

Since there were no other arguments Rin or I could think of, we agreed to wash separately. It couldn't hurt too much to accept the hospitality offered to us, right? Whatever the reason we were here, it would do neither of us any good to resist. Besides, I really needed a shower anyway.

* * *

 **To trust is perhaps the scariest thing we can ever do. When we trust, we are giving someone the weapon to hurt us. When we trust, we give someone everything they will ever need to destroy us.**

 **When it's put it that way, wouldn't you agree that trust is a very precious gift that we can never truly earn?**

 **It's normal to trust friends and family, but even they can hurt us worse than our enemies. So how do were really know who it is we can trust? How often does a person have to prove themselves worthy? Do they need to trust us in return.**

 **Funny enough, I used to never have questions about trust.**

"Sorry," Mikuo apologized as he threw down the clothes for me to change into, "but we don't have any Love Maker attire. Hope you always wanted to try being a Love Wrecker."

I stared at the solid black lying on what was supposed to be my bed while Rin and I stayed with the community. My "bedroom" was nothing more than a small, wooden room with no furniture save a bed, desk, and stool. It was more claustrophobic than cozy. Not to mention it was very awkward that Mikuo simply walked right in while I was wearing nothing but a towel around my waist.

"Thanks," I said, clutching my towel as if it would fall to my ankles if I didn't. Mikuo just nodded before he left. While I figured out how I was supposed to wear Love Wrecker clothing, I wondered if Mikuo's coming and going would be the norm, and if Zeito or Rui would also make a habit of walking in unannounced.

To make matters worse, the bedroom door didn't have a lock.

"Whoa," Rin said after I changed into the clothes and met her in the hall. Rui was with her, but neither of the boys were in sight. "You look great in black. Are you sure you're meant to be a Love Maker? Because you look like you were born to wear black."

"In other words," Rui grinned, "Rin thinks you look hot."

Rin glared at the smaller girl. "Nero wouldn't be hot even if he took a trip to Hell."

"I still have feelings that can be hurt," I said, but Rin didn't acknowledge it.

"Nero's never worn black before," Rin continued to say to Rui. "How would you react if you saw Zeito wearing white?"

"I'd kill him because that's not Zeito," Rui didn't hesitate to reply. "He wouldn't be caught dead in white. For real, he told me that if I ever saw him in white, kill him because that's not really him but his evil clone."

"This just turned into a cheesy sci-fi," I mumbled. Louder, "Can we eat now, please?"

"Yes," Rui said, looking at both Rin and me now. "Tonio has returned, and he is eager to meet you both."

"Even me?" I asked.

"Of course," Rui answered, her smile sickly sweet. "He wants to know what kind of idiot would wander into a place like this with a girl he's not even partners with."

If I said that comment didn't somewhat offend me, I would be lying.

Rui lead us down the hall, and as we walked, I tried to keep up with the mental map I was forming in my head. We had taken only one set of stairs, and now we were going down those some stairs as we made our way to the dining room. Frustratingly, the place looked like one giant maze. All the walls were the same peeling yellow wallpaper, and the wooden floors have nothing distinguishable about them from place to place. If not for my mapping everything out from the moment we arrived, I wouldn't have noticed that Rui lead us in a different direction than where we've previously been after we descended the stairs.

"This place is a total dump," Rin commented, not finding it in her best interest to be polite.

"We do have a rotation for chores," Rui replied, not sounding offended at all, "but sometimes cleaning gets thrown on the backburner. To be fair, this place could use a total overhaul. The problem is we don't get enough funding to afford a makeover."

"How much funding do you guys receive?" I asked.

Rui chuckled. "None at all."

My cheeks heated up. She was joking. Shaking her head, Rin mumbled something about my being stupid.

"Tonio requested a small audience tonight," Rui said as we turned yet another corner. When we entered the room, I saw that this small audience consisted of the three of us - Zeito, Mikuo, and a man I hadn't seen before. He had neatly trimmed dark hair and stubble on his face. This guy might have been in his late thirties or early forties, but when we entered, he greeted us with more energy than necessary.

"At last I finally meet you, Rin Kagamine." He jumped to his feet and stuck out his hand. "Might I say, I'm a big fan of yours."

Rin looked at his hand as if he offered her a giant spider. "Should I be worried?"

"Very." Zeito began helping himself to the food on the table. We were eating meatloaf and mashed potatoes. "Much like how he did with Mikuo, Tonio knows a lot about you."

Seeing that Rin was not going to accept the handshake, Tonio placed his hand by his side and said, "That is very much true. You see, Rin, we here in the society have been watching you for a very, very long time. However, before we get into all that, why don't we sit down and eat?"

"How about we get to what you know about me?" Rin cut in, her shoulders square. "My brother is missing. God, I can't imagine what's happening to him right now, and you're suggesting we kick back, relax, and eat meatloaf? What the hell?! Who are you, what do you know, and why am I here?"

"If we could just sit down-"

"Answer me!" Rin snapped, her face instantly turning bright red. Her nails dug into her palms, and her veins began to bulge. "You said that you've been watching me for years. What do you mean by that?"

Tonio opened and closed his mouth a few times. When he realized that there was no point in arguing with Rin – if he really had been watching her for years, he wouldn't need to learn from experience how pointless arguing with Rin is – he sighed. "You think nobody noticed when you took your brother's place, but we did. You never knew this, and neither did your parents, but the day it was evaluated between you and Len who the Love Maker and Love Wrecker were, you were being observe by most of my people."

It was Rin's turn to open and close her mouth. Shaking her head, she finally found the words. "I don't understand. We were being watched?"

"We saw the whole process," Tonio confirmed. "Please, if you would just sit down-"

"Why were you watching us?!"

Slowly, I stood closer to Rin. When she didn't bark at me to back off, I touched her hand ever so gently. She snatched her fingers from my grasp, uninterested in the comfort I was offering.

"Why were you watching us?!" she repeated.

"Almost twenty years ago," Tonio began slowly, "we Streamers argued that although you were born into sets of two, that didn't mean one child was automatically a Love Maker and the other a Love Wrecker. To prove this argument wrong, those in charge of separating the children invited us to see the process itself. Rin, how is it determined which child is the Love Maker and the other a Love Wrecker?"

Without hesitating, Rin replied, "The children are tested. Which of the two breaks the things, which of the two doesn't get along with the other children, and which of the two is angered all the time. Love Wrecker children are short tempered and don't bond with others well at all. The aggressive child is the one labelled as the Love Wrecker, and the other is by default the Love Maker."

"And you see why many argue that the system is flawed?"

"It's not perfect, but we're tested when we're six. By that point in your life, who you are as a person is typically set. The so-called 'nice children' are eager to make friends and help people fall in love while their siblings are more individualistic, competitive, and want nothing to do with helping others."

"And this is just establishing which child is which." Tonio nodded. "The school system from there takes care of the training, but the day you're determined is the day that is the most important in your kind's life."

"It just so happened that the separation you observed was Len's and mine?" Rin questioned.

"It wasn't the only one," Tonio confirmed, "but yours stood out. Did you know that while you and your brother were being observed, we saw Len break the glass heart in the room you two played in? A proper Love Maker, no matter how young, would never do such a thing. According to your psychology, breaking a heart-shaped object – especially on purpose – is something your kind tend to avoid. It's like how most humans, even those so young, know not to fall off high places or touch a fire. With infants, these things can be forgiven, but a child who should already be developing the desire to want to bring people together? To do such a thing would automatically label him as a Love Wrecker.

"Fortunately for you, only me and two of my colleagues were there, behind the window you saw as a mirror, while this happened. Your observers left for a lunch break, so they missed this little detail. At first we were surprised for it was Len who played with other children, not you. Len didn't act grumpy every time he was interacted with, but you did.

"When you both were questioned about it later, you took the blame. You, Rin Kagamine, took the blame for something your brother did, and you've been living with those consequences ever since. We never corrected them. Looking back, we should have, but we never did. We wanted to know how somebody with your biology would do in the opposing world. It's to this day our very surprise that you not only survived, but you excelled. However, the question that has always haunted me is this: Why did you do it? Why would you do this to yourself when it was not want you were meant to have?"

"Because I love my brother," Rin replied. Her breaths were still ragged, but she began to show signs of calming down. "He was always really weak; he would've been crushed if he was raised where he belonged. I, on the other hand, could handle it. So I convinced him to act the way he needed to act while I did the opposite. Everything I did was to protect him." Blinking tears from her eyes, Rin added softly, "But instead I damned him."

"I don't understand," I said, completely lost. "How did you damn Len? What did you do?"

Rin laughed without humor. "You really are an idiot, aren't you? Nero, the facts are staring you in the face, and yet you still can't see them? Len and I switched roles all those years ago and kept up the façade ever since. You see, Len isn't the real Love Maker of the two of us. I am."

* * *

 **There are many sides to one story. There are many sides to a single person. There are many sides to a relationship.**

 **When trust and loyalty run deeper than blood, should that be a reason to fear? Is being so committed to a person something dangerous? Or is it something more?**

 **Unless you see this person at their ugliest and struggling at their worst, you can never know what it means to truly be loyal to them.**

I admit, I did feel like an idiot that I couldn't figure that little detail out sooner. The evidence was there, even when Rin and I were children. However, Rin played it so well that you can't fully blame me for not knowing for absolute sure until then.

"There was no way I could let him go through that," Rin told me later that night. She was in the room assigned to me, sitting at the foot of the bed and refusing to make eye contact with me. "I got to go with my cousins to see both schools when I was younger, which is an opportunity not a lot of us get to do before we are determined what we are. Len was sick that day and stayed with our parents, so it was just IA, IO, and me.

"The cruelty of the Love Wrecker school was evident even to my four-year-old eyes. It wasn't that the school was trying to be abusive, but you have to understand that it's a hard upbringing that makes us the vicious kind we are. We're made to feel isolated from our own families – a rather easy feat if you ask me because more often than not a single Love Wrecker lives in a house filled with Love Makers - and we're punished when we chose to act selflessly. If we're too compassionate, we can't do our job right. There has to be a desire to want to hurt others. Love Wreckers need that deep brokenness that makes them want to take it out on others. Their nature calls them to it.

"Yet I didn't understand that. All I understood as a little girl was that my baby brother, who was sick all the time and smaller than he should've been, would have been crushed in that education system. He's always been sensitive for a Love Wrecker: that school would have beaten him mercilessly to get it out of him. The thought . . . scared me.

"So I plotted how to protect him. He and I both couldn't be deemed Love Makers, so I made sure I was the one whom everyone thought was a Love Wrecker. Knowing what my intent was, Len let me help him make friends and act like those fun kids we saw at the park. The idiot almost blew it when he got frustrated at the sight of that glass heart when we were locked in that room for the day, but other than that, I thought nobody would ever know. Except they did the whole freaking time, and now all my worst fears are coming to life."

You have to understand how terrifying it was to see Rin cry. She never cried, or at least not where she could be seen. To see her at such a broken state caused an aching in my chest. All I could think to do was sit beside her on the bed and wrap an arm around her shoulders. To my surprise, she didn't elbow me in the ribs.

"So you really do feel love, after all," I whispered. Looking back, that was perhaps not the wisest thing to say to Rin.

"Just because you now know the truth does not make me someone different," Rin replied, a growl hidden in her words despite her still flowing tears. "I'm still just as much me as I was before dinner, and just like before, I hate love with a burning passion." Without giving me a chance to ask why, Rin said, "It's because of love we're in this place. It's because of love Len's missing. It's because of love I have spent the past twelve years terrified to go to bed because I can't shake the fear that somebody knows. Had I truly been the Love Wrecker, I would never have cared. I would have entered that school with intent to raise Hell. That's what I did, anyway, so imagine what I truly would have been capable of had it not all been pretend."

Although it might not have a good idea to ask, the curiosity weighed on me. I had to ask. "Does this mean you don't mind breaking couples up?"

Shrugging, Rin answered, "Truth be told, I like my job. The only couples I ever target are those in unhealthy relationships, and breaking them up does help to ease the pain inflicted upon me while I grew up. Those break ups benefit both me and the people involved, or so I like to think. Imagining it that way makes me feel less like the monster I am."

"You're not a monster."

"Then why do I hurt everyone I touch? Why am I the reason for destruction of those I love most?" Rin shook me off and rose to her feet. "Good night, Nero."

"Good night, Rin," I returned, but she was already out of ear shot.

Fast forward a few weeks – yes, Rin and I stayed there that long – and things get interesting again. In the span of time we've been there, Rin and I had, to some extent, learned to trust those we stayed with. Many faces came and went, but Mikuo, Zeito, and Rui were constant company. Here, we later learned, we were safe. The people who had taken Len and Miku were looking for Rin, too, our sources said. They wanted to see how Rin would react to the "rehabilitation" inflicted on Miku and Len.

"What the actual hell do you mean by 'rehabilitation'?" Rin demanded the moment she was informed of where Len was and what was happening to him.

"Just that, Rin: Rehabilitation," Tonio replied. He had called Rin to his office and invited me for moral support. I quickly realized by "moral support" Tonio meant somebody to hold Rin back in case she tried to murder him. "They are trying to restore Len and Miku to their true nature. They want . . . they want to see how far the training you receive growing up really goes."

"And why would they want to do that?" Rin curled her fingers into fists. Her knuckles turned a chalk, boney shade of white.

"That is beyond me," Tonio said. "When we first started observing you, all we meant to do was observe you. There was no interest whatsoever in influencing you or your brother in any way. Of course I should point out that it was my people who kidnapped Mikuo and Miku from their parents and hid them in the human world to be raised as such, so we're not completely innocent.

"However, merely observing wasn't enough for some of us. They thought you were weapons that could bring the whole system down. Word got out, rumors circulated, and now the government is involved. The reason we are glad that you have meet with us, Rin, and stayed on your own free will is because they are looking for you. If the Streamers who have broken away are correct in their theory that it's the training which determines who is the Love Maker and who is the Love Wrecker, you, Len, Mikuo, and Miku will be eliminated. Those Streamers think that the system will be brought down, but they and all involved will be destroyed for the sake of keeping up tradition."

"But doesn't biology determine who's who in the sets of children?" I asked. "I was raised and trained to be a Love Maker, but that doesn't mean I fit into a simple classification. Same can be said of my sister – she likes soap operas of all things!"

"Our years of observance do favor nature over nurture," Tonio confirmed, "but that won't matter to them."

"And why is that?"

"Because many want to argue that what you were born is what you're meant to be," Tonio answered. "Even if nature wins tenfold, what is going on now is a challenge to the system. There's no knowing how many will join this cause. It's better to end it then to let it get out of hand."

Rin lurched forward in her chair. "Then why are we sitting her and not helping Len? If they will kill him when they're finished, why are we sitting around and twiddling our thumbs?"

Pulling his collar away from his neck, Tonio said slowly but with uncertainty. "The truth is, Rin, we've known about this for two weeks now. The reason we waited to mention it to you is because until now, there was nothing we can do."

"What changed?"

"Miku escaped, and now Len is sent to find her. This is our chance to save them both. That's why you were called in today. Of all the people we think could bring Len to us, you're our best bet."

* * *

 **There is so much I don't understand.**

 **There is so much I want to know.**

 **Why do we hide what we want to be known?**

 **Why is it those capable of doing us more harm are those we love the most?**

 **The more I learn, the more questions I have.**

Just because Rin was the best candidate to hunt down Len, and hopefully Miku as a consequence, doesn't mean that tracking her brother down was easy. If anything, it was far harder than Rin anticipated. Of all the places he could have gone, he wasn't in any of them.

"I even checked the places he would hide because, to almost everyone else, the hiding place would be unpredictable," Rin grumbled after our third day searching, shoulders forced back and head too heavy to hold high. The lack of progress weighed Rin down more than she was letting show. "If he really is out there, why can't I find him? I know Len better than anyone. Or at least I thought I did."

Taking into consideration the little I knew already, I suggested, "Do you think he would be with Miku? She was with him when they were taken, so it's possible that he would stick with her out of guilt."

For a while, Rin didn't say anything. It appeared that she was tossing the words inside her head, evaluating their possibility to be true. She must have been unable to think of anything better, for she replied, "Might as well look into it. At this point, I have no other ideas."

Long story short, we found our way to Miku's ex-boyfriend's house. "So this is where you were when you broke your last couple up?" I asked, studying the apartment complex as I tried to figure out which belonged to this Kaito.

"You should know," Rin answered. "I used you as a tool to finish off the project."

 _Project._ Even though she was truly a Love Maker, Rin treated the break up as if this was no different from rearranging a home or building a piece of furniture – something to put time and effort in but to completely forget about once it was completed. However, she didn't look regretful as she talked about breaking Miku and Kaito up. She actually showed a small smile, as if she still recalled the event with fond memories.

"About that," I said slowly, "was kissing me really necessary?"

"It was a quick fix to a problem I had," Rin replied. "How could it be more? You're so unpracticed in kissing that it was hard to pretend that pressing my lips against yours was enjoyable."

"Do you enjoy making me feel less than?"

"Always."

Half an hour later, we found Len. He was sitting alone on a roof, feet hanging over the edge. Whatever he was going through, it seemed to be crushing him from the inside out. We stood behind the raised door of the building's emergency exit, unseen by the one we spent the longest time wondering about.

Rin held her finger in front of her lip. Slowly, she took out a tranquilizer gun that Tonio gave her to use when we found Len and Miku. We may have been encouraged to try to talk them into coming first, but Rin didn't want to use that option. Better to knock her brother out and explain later what was going on than to take our chances, Rin argued.

With the softness of a cat, Rin snuck from behind the emergency exit and approached Len. Trembling, Rin held out the tranquilizer and aimed it between Len's shoulder blades. "Brother," she gently called out to gain his attention.

To my surprise, Len didn't turn around. I thought he would be eager to see Rin after all this time, but he acted as if she wasn't there to begin with. "For somebody who told me to stay away," he said the words with an underlining sadness, "you sure follow me everywhere I go, Sister."

Rin took a shaky breath. "Everything I did was to protect you. I never said my actions were the right ones."

"Didn't stop me from trusting you blindly."

This shocked Rin to silence. So many emotions, so many thoughts had to be running through her right then. She struggled just to tell Len the words "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too." Len buried his face in his hands. Mumbling through his palms, he said, "I miss you so much. You're my strength, Rin. You're the only rock I've ever known." Len sat up again. "I know I never told you this before, but I look up to you more than any other person on this planet. I now know what you suffered and endured by taking my place. Rin, why didn't you tell me that they beat you, whipped you, and isolated you? Why didn't you tell me that they would send electric shocks to your body every time you had a happy thought? Why didn't you tell me? Why?

"Even back then I knew you were going through Hell just to protect me, but it's only now that I really _know_. It makes me respect you and look up to you even more. You chose to go through that, just for me." Len gave an eerie laugh. "But you're not really here. We pushed each other away, and no matter how much or how deeply you love someone, even that ocean of love can dry up and become a barren desert. We let that happen, and I don't know if we could ever go back."

Shaken to her core, Rin dropped the gun to her side and turned away. Gasping for breath, Rin ran towards me and whispered, "I can't do this. Nero, I can't do this now. Let's go back, please. Please don't make me do this now."

I wanted to argue that we might not have this chance again. I wanted to take the gun from Rin and shoot it at Len myself. But this wasn't my battle, and Rin wasn't ready to face it yet. As I saw Rin cry for the second time since I've known her, I knew this situation had to wait. If another chance didn't come, we would make one. Right then, Rin needed to grieve for the future that was quickly approaching us.

"You don't have to do this now," I told her. I wrapped my arm around her, and, to my very surprise, she buried her face into my shoulder. As she silently cried, I whispered, "It's okay, Rin. Let's go. It's okay."


	3. Part 3

**Do you ever get that feeling . . . that maybe you don't know anything at all?**

 **Perhaps deep down . . . you get the impression that everyone is hiding something from you?**

 **And even deeper down . . . you're hiding something from yourself?**

We didn't go back to the community. Instead, Rin and I spent the night at a motel. Not having any way to pay for our room, Rin manifested cash with her physical form. The "money" would have since long vanished in the cash register by that point. I felt bad for pretty much stealing from the motel, but I felt worse for Rin.

She didn't sleep at all that night. To make the situation worse, she was so depressed from the moments before that she didn't even react when the manager wasn't shy about his assumption that Rin and I had rented the room for, ahem, "activities." Normally her disgust at the very thought would insult me, but in that moment I wanted her to express those negative feelings for the idea of us together. That would have been better than how mopey she acted all throughout that night.

Neither of us lied on the bed for the majority of the night. We simply sat at the foot, Rin's head resting against my shoulder, with no lights on save for the light coming from the television. Rin had cried herself out hours ago. By that point, we were silently watching _I Love Lucy_ marathons. Once in a while Rin would chuckle at some of Lucy's tactics, but that was it. However. I supposed her chuckling was better than her not reacting at all. Anyone who can watch _I Love Lucy_ and not at least smile at some point during the show has some serious psychological issues going on.

During one of the commercial breaks, Rin randomly asked, "Nero, can I ask you a question?"

"Well, you just did."

"Haha, you're so clever."

"What do you want to ask?" was how I answered.

"I was just wondering . . ." Rin stopped, took a deep breath, and tried again. "Have you ever been in love?"

I snapped my head in her direction so fast that it hurt my neck. Yet all I could do was stare at Rin as if I had never seen her before. "Why do you ask that of all things?"

Rin shrugged. It might just be the colors emitting from the Wendy's commercial, but Rin's cheeks were turning a bright shade of red. "I'm curious. Falling in love just seems to be something everyone does. From anywhere between the feelings are returned, to the two go out, to that love going unrequited, everyone has at some point in their lives has been in love. Len's been in love, almost every Love Maker has been in love at least three times before they turned sixteen, and even a couple of Love Wreckers I know have partners they won't claim to be in love with but they are still incredibly loyal to them. Makes me wonder if you have ever been in love."

Bracing myself for all kinds of responses, I asked Rin, "Have you ever been in love?"

Rin laughed with less humor than the chuckles she gave for Lucy. "I wouldn't know. I've always been too scared for both Len's and my lives to really stop to ponder if I have ever been in love with anyone. How would I know? What does being in love feel like?"

"Well," I smiled, "you get queasy around this person, but you like to be with them anyway. You love talking to them, but thinking about how you feel about them makes you feel nauseas. Nobody like that person makes you feel so alive, but nobody like that person scares the life out of you, either. Really, being in love is living a paradox."

"Oh."

"You think you might have been in love?"

"Maybe, but I also could have had the stomach flu so I can't say for sure," Rin answered. She let out a deep breath. "You never answered my question."

"Okay, I hear you." I hesitated for a moment, not sure why I did. Sure, I can tell you easily that I had a number of crushes growing up. It's a part of life, isn't it? But as for actually being in love, I wasn't too sure. Yet as I thought about the girl leaning on me, I discovered something I never knew until that very moment.

"I have been in love," I told Rin. "Once. Just once. Puts me below average for a Love Maker, huh?"

"Did your feelings go anywhere?"

"Nah. They were unrequited."

"Did you confess?"

"Never."

"And why is that?"

"I knew this person could never feel about me the way I felt about them. Confessing would have been setting myself up for rejection."

"Nero." Rin sat up and looked me in the eyes. I noticed the show had come back on, but I tuned it out in favor of listening to Rin. "You are a great guy. I know I can be pretty mean to you-"

"'Pretty mean'?" I interrupted, but Rin didn't break her flow.

"-but I do actually think you're an amazing person. I don't doubt that you could have any girl you wanted."

Shaking my head, I couldn't stop myself from questioning, "Where is this all coming from?"

"With everything going on recently, I've found myself thinking about things I never thought about before." Rin looked away and bit her lower lip. "You up and left everything for Len and me. Just like that. No time to think about any of it or what this would mean for you. I hated to think that you were leaving behind someone you might have cared for just to help me find Len."

"Like I said," I shrugged, "the person I love could never return my feelings."

"You just used present tense. Are you still in love with this person?"

"As much as I wish I wasn't, I am."

"Oh." Rin's eyes flickered across the room before they finally landed on me again. "Don't let your doubts stop you. If you really love someone, then say something. What do you have to lose?"

"Easy for you to say since you've never been in love," I said.

Then Rin froze. Her lips moved, but no words came out. She kind of reminded me of a goldfish if not for her looking over me as if she wasn't sure who I was anymore. "Good point," Rin finally said. She stood up and walked to the bathroom. "After this episode, we should try going to bed. You're sleeping on the floor."

"Of course I am." While Rin took care of business, I grabbed a pillow and the top blanket. However, I also couldn't stop thinking about what had just passed between us. Why would Rin bring up something like that? Since when did she care if I had ever been in love? It was almost as if that girl was not the Rin I grew up with.

The thing that I couldn't get over though was Rin's statement that I could have any girl I wanted. Why would she say something like that? What was she trying to tell me?

Too bad I didn't figure it out until it was too late.

As I lied on the floor and stared at the ceiling, Rin emerged from the bathroom and looked down on me. "I wasn't expecting you to actually sleep on the ground."

"Didn't you tell me I was sleeping on the floor?" I snuggled deeper into my moldy blanket. "Besides, it wouldn't be appropriate. We don't care for each other like that."

"No," Rin said slowly, "we don't. Good night, Nero."

"Good night, Rin," I returned.

Rin didn't leave right away. Instead she stared down at me, wanting to say something but battling within herself whether or not to say it. Just before I could open my mouth to ask what it was she wanted, Rin turned away and crawled into the bed. We didn't say anything from there. All we did was try to sleep.

I say "try" because I know neither of us slept that night. The constant shuffling of the sheets told me that Rin was too restless to sleep, and her words from earlier were still filling my every thought. When morning came, we pretended that the conversation never happened. Maybe it was for the better that way.

* * *

 **If I could go back in time and change anything, would I do it?**

 **There's so much I would do differently. There are so many mistake I wouldn't make. There's no reason to not put myself out there because I already know that I will always regret choosing to let fear rule me.**

 **Yet if I did go back and changed those things, would I be who I am today?**

Rin was slow to get ready the next morning. It was as if she didn't want to do what needed to be done. I don't think she wanted to do it at all. With all her talk of helping Len, you would think she wouldn't hesitate to do just that. However, as she prepared to meet him again after many months apart, Rin probably hesitated out of dread of all the possible negative outcomes of this reunion.

"We have to do this," I said before I knew I was opening my mouth.

"Of course we do," Rin agreed, "but that doesn't mean it will be easy."

And it wasn't.

We showed up just in time to hear blue-haired say, what I was shocked to later learn was under Len's influence, "I gave a used person like you a chance, and this is how you repay me?"

The look of utter betrayal on the woman was enough to break my heart even without knowing the context of this situation. I don't think she would have been more hurt had the man across from her rose and stabbed her with his fork. "I deserve better," she forced the words out.

Len and Miku were so into this . . . this . . . whatever the hell this was that neither of them realized Rin and I had arrived. Granted Rin and I stood quietly by the doorway and didn't make a big announcement of our arrival, but I thought we wouldn't have been so unnoticed. That goes to show how focused Len and Miku were. Rin and I, on the other hand, were so transfixed with what was happening that we didn't react right away.

"How can you do better than me?" The man laughed so bitterly that I felt nauseous. "Remind me again: how many guys were willing to give you a chance after you told them your secret? They all lied to you and said that it didn't matter, but the truth is all men want to marry a virgin."

"These same men being the ones who sleep around enough as it is already," the woman argued. "Men are not loyal."

The man shot to his feet. "You can't make a man's life hell and expect that he'll still want to stay together. Women have these insane standards for men, and yet they call men pigs for having their own preferences. Makes me wonder why we even try."

It was when the woman, with tears in her eyes, asked "Why do we even try?" that Rin and I took action.

Rin ripped Len away from the man's heart of hearts while I targeted Miku. The girl took one look at me, began to cuss, and fought like a wild raccoon when I took hold of her. She punched, screamed, and kicked, and I knew I was going to have some serious bruises for the next few weeks.

"LET ME GO!" she shouted, nearly blowing my eardrums.

Not wanting to do it but not wanting to lose a limb more, I stuck Miku with a syringe. The tranquilizer ran through her system quickly, and she went limp in my arms. How quiet she was immediately afterwards lessened my regret knocking her out.

"I'm sorry, Len," I heard Rin say before her gun went off. When I looked at her, she was in tears. It was all she could do to rip her eyes off of Len's unconscious body.

"Why do we try?"

Rin and I looked to the man and woman, unaware of what was going on around them. Acting quickly, we lied the unconscious Miku and Len next to each other and went to work. We didn't communicate; we just took action.

When I entered the woman's heart of hearts, I was shocked at what I found. What did Miku do to her? There was so much hurt and distrust within her soul that I began to feel what she felt.

The woman's heart sat on her knees and sobbed into her palms. I knelt next to her and put a hand on her shoulder. She would never, ever sense that someone was there, but at least she wouldn't be truly alone.

"Why do you try?" I whispered to her, forcing her to find the answer. Her memories flashed before my eyes, showing me the reasons she decided this man was worth the effort in the first place.

When they met, a group of men were flirting with her while she was shopping for groceries. Kaito approached her and pretended to be her boyfriend. She played along, and the men left. What really got her interest, however, was that this man didn't expect anything in return. He didn't even give her his number.

They met again two weeks later. He was trying to find a certain book in the store, and she, being a valued employee, helped him find it. Helping a customer quickly turned into conversation, and conversation led to attraction. It was her who gave him her number.

Things started slow. He had just come out of a relationship and had come to the sense that he needed to reevaluate the purpose of being with someone. She confessed that she herself was weary but still willing to take risks for love.

Despite not being official, they saw each other regularly. They made each other smile, laugh, and feel something neither wanted to admit was there. Before things got serious, she told him her secret. When he didn't shun her or think less of her for it, she cried at how accepting he was.

 _Was it possible he had changed between then and now?_ she asked herself.

"No," I told her. "He changed for you. It started for himself, but you were enough for him to keep going. He isn't perfect, and he will make mistakes. You just have to decided if you will accept him just as much in the ugly times as you do in the beautiful."

Tears poured from her eyes. I was right. When you love someone, you stick by them when things get too hard. If they can't carry themselves, you stay to lend a hand. Sometimes the relationship must end, and that's okay, but it shouldn't be thrown away when there's something there that makes the relationship worth it. Before you decide whether to stay or go, you must determine whether the second chance truly is deserved.

In this case, it was.

"We keep trying because we both know this relationship is worth fighting for," the man said, eyes watering. "I don't know what's come over me these past few days, but Meiko, I love you and don't want to hurt you like that ever again."

The woman began to cry as well. "Can we fix this?"

"I know we can, even though it's clear we have some personal things we need to work out as well."

Wiping her eyes, the woman replied, "I think we should see a counselor." They did need to see one. Rin and I couldn't stick around to help them with their problems, so I suggested the idea.

It must have taken Rin a lot of work to get Kaito to agree, because it took him a moment to say, "You're right."

Rin and I stayed long enough for the couple to set up an appointment. When that task was complete, we dragged Miku and Len outside so that we could activate our pocket portal. I still hated the thing, but I was ready to go.

"Thank you," Rin said as we waited for the machine to warm up. "I couldn't have done this without you."

For a moment, I looked at Rin. Her shoulders slumped, and her head was down. No tears flowed down her cheeks, but a sigh escaped her lips.

"You're welcome," I finally said. We didn't speak again until after we went through the portal and Rin had to talk me through my portal sickness.

* * *

 **As long as the days can be, they are over before you know it.**

 **Blink, and you miss everything.**

 **There are so many moments in my life that I would give anything to relive, even just for a minute.**

 **Try as I might, I can't stop these times from slipping away.**

 **All I can do is hope that when I look back on them, I can say that I didn't take a single second for granted.**

Needless to say, Miku and Len were not happy campers when they woke up. They were kept in separate rooms, the doors securely locked. The walls were sound-proof as well, which I think was a good thing. The rage and twisted looks Miku and Len wore on their faces told me that I did not want to hear the shouting, screaming, and yelling that was going on inside their respective rooms.

Rin, of course, was nowhere near this location while her brother acted like a rabid animal. Now Tonio did give her the option to be there with her brother, but she turned it down and asked that I go in her place. "I knew that I wouldn't be able to see Len in such a state," she told me later. "To be betrayed by me, the only person he ever truly trusted, and brought to this strange place – all immediately after what he went through as well? If this 'rehabilitation' he went through really did try to bring him back to his true nature, then I know his first response when he woke up was anything but pretty."

I didn't hide it from her that she was right. I even told her what Len seemed to yell at me when he saw me on the other side of the glass. I may have not heard exactly what it was that he said, but the look of pure murderous rage on his face told me all that I needed to know.

It took three days – three days! – for Len and Miku to calm down enough for a psychologist to enter their rooms and talk with them without fear of being ripped apart. Chances are it helped that Len and Miku were hungry and slightly dehydrated, too. As regularly as they were served, only so much food and drink can fit through the slots on the doors.

Two days after this new attitude adjustment, Len was asking to see Rin. Before he only shouted unkind things about her, but now that he was not consumed with so much anger and hatred, I believe that he genuinely wanted to talk to her and figure out, in her own words, what was going on. Tonio did deem the meeting appropriate, especially since Len would be cuffed to his bed, but Rin refused.

"Why are you denying Len's request to see you?" I asked. "I'm sure he really just wants to talk with you. There's no way he's still that mad, right?"

Rin sighed. "It's not that." She tucked her knees into her chest. By that point, she had spent a lot of time in my room. If she wasn't eating with everyone else during meals or sleeping in her room at night, she stayed with me in my room. I'm not so introverted that I typically spend my days locked inside my bedroom, but I didn't have it in me to leave Rin to hang out with the others when it was clear the only company she wanted to have in that time was mine.

"Then what is it?" I asked.

Instead of replying, Rin looked away from me and stared at the floor. A soft, nearly inaudible sigh escaped her lips. She hugged her knees closer to her chest. Those little movements alone were answer enough.

"You're ashamed to face him," I called out. "All you ever wanted to do was protect Len, and you failed. Now you can't stand to see him after you didn't do the one thing you have dedicated your entire life to doing." Rin didn't say anything. "Tell me that I'm wrong."

"I could," Rin said, "but then I would be lying."

"Rin, I don't believe for a second that Len's going to hold a grudge over this, especially since this isn't your fault."

"You seem to forget that this all began with an idea stupid little kid me had and have held onto all these years." Rin buried her face into her knees. "I know Len doesn't blame me, but that doesn't stop me in being so ashamed. However, I'll get over it eventually. Until then, I just want some space. Len's safe now; there's no reason to pressure the reunion. Is there?"

"No," I replied slowly. "I suppose there isn't."

We sat in silence for a minute before Rin said, "Hey, Nero?"

"Yes?"

"Could you be the one to talk to Len to see how he's doing? Just because I don't want to be the one to speak with him personally doesn't mean I want to totally ignore him either."

I think the request over before I stiffly nod. "The person he wants to see is you, but I'll check on him if that's what you really want."

Looking up, Rin reaffirmed me. "It is. Now go talk to him, please. I don't know how much longer I can go not knowing what exactly is running through his head."

 _Whatever Len wants to tell you, I doubt he's going to tell me,_ is what I want to say, but I keep it simply as a thought. What I actually tell Rin is "Okay" before I begin my journey to find Tonio, or anyone else who will let me speak with Len.

"Hey, stranger," is how Rui greets me when she sees me coming down the hall. "I don't see much of you anymore. Nor do I see Rin. Is everything all right with you two?"

"Rin is . . . ," I trail off, trying to find the right words to say. "Rin is handling this situation the best that she can. This is all too much in such a short amount of time, you know?"

Rui nodded. She knew. I didn't know how she knew, but she knew. "And you, Nero?"

"I'm just doing whatever I can to help Rin. There's no way she could handle this whole situation by herself." Rui chuckled. "What?"

"You two aren't partners, yet you care an awful lot for this girl." Rui shows me the most genuine smile I've ever seen on her face. "I do believe that friendship is a very powerful thing – I know from my relationship with Zeito that two people don't have to be partners to have a deep, meaningful connection, but you truly care for this girl more than simple friendship, don't you?"

"Rin and I grew up together," I reminded her.

Raising her brows, Rui questioned, "So you see Rin as a sister?" I didn't have a reply to that. Rui grinned. "Don't worry, Nero. I won't tell anyone anything. Your secret's safe with me."

I changed the subject. "Where's Tonio? I want to talk to him about speaking with Len."

"Ah, don't worry about him." Rui waved her hand. "He left a little while ago to meet with our spies in enemy headquarters and won't be back until later. You don't need to wait for him in order to speak with your old friend."

"He'll be all right with it?"

"There's a possibility that Tonio would rather have Rin speak with Len, but what he doesn't know won't hurt him." Rui casted me a sideways glance. "Let me guess: Rin wants you to talk to Len for her."

I stiffly nodded. "Yeah. Really it should be Rin walking with you now, but I can't make her do what she doesn't want to do. If she wants to wait to speak with Len and sends somebody else in her place until she's ready, then God help the idiot who tries to convince her to change her mind."

"I don't blame her," Rui said. We were descending the stairs at this point, making our way down a hallway I've only previously walked through a couple of times. "Before your little friends were of interest to the Streamers, the Streamers would actually practice their 'rehabilitation' on regular Love Wreckers and Love Makers."

Nearly stopping in my tracks, I exclaimed, "You're kidding!"

Rui sighed. "I wish I was. You've heard of the unsolved kidnappings that happened in the European Love World pockets about four, maybe five years ago, right?" I nodded. "My closest ally and Zeito's partner, Zatsune, was one of the victims."

Her words took a while to process. "You mean . . . ?"

"That the Streamers took somebody that I cared about, twisted this person to become something they're not for the Streamers sick experiment, and then disposed of this person as if they have never mattered? Yes." By this point, Rui had stopped walking. Now she stared at her toes, her fingers curled into fists. "Although the Streamers may have 'perfected' their 'rehabilitation,' it didn't come without a cost. Many Love Wreckers and Love Makers lost their minds to these experiments, and what do you do with a rabid animal?" She didn't give me a chance to answer. Rui barked a humorless laugh and said, "You put it down."

Shaking her head, Rui continued to lead me to where Len was as she finished, "I could pretend that Zeito and I are here to save lives and to keep others from experiencing the loss that we endured, but we're not that heroic. Truly, we just want revenge. We want to find the people who abducted, tortured, and killed Zatsune and finish them off slowly. We want to see the life drain from their eyes as we let them know that their suffering is to avenge those they have damned."

With nothing to say to that, Rui and I spend the rest of the walk in silence. Fortunately, it wasn't a long walk. I don't think I could have stood it if we didn't speak to each other for a long time after what Rui had just told me.

"Nero here would like to speak to the male one," Rui said as soon as we entered a ballroom-sized area. Mikuo and Zeito, probably on guard duty, looked up from their Uno game. "Rin asked that he go in her place," Rui added as if that comment made a difference. Maybe it did.

"Sure he'll be happy to see you?" Zeito asked. "You did help his sister kidnap him the last time you two were in the same room together."

"It's either me or nobody else," I answered. "Len wants to see Rin, but Rin doesn't want to see him. Not yet, that is. Until then, she wants me to talk to Len to figure out how he's doing." I looked over to Mikuo, who continued to stare at his hand as if he had to find the best strategy possible to beat Zeito at the card game. "Have you introduced yourself to Miku yet?"

For a while Mikuo didn't respond. Then, with a shake of his head, he replied, "I can't bring myself to meet her. Not after what happened. Not like this." He tossed the keys to Rui, who caught them with a snatch of her hand. "Take as long as you need. You should discuss whatever it is you need to without the pressure of leaking time."

"Thank you," I said as Rui lead me to Len's cell. As she unlocked the door, I told her, "Thank you as well, Rui. I appreciate everything you did for Rin and me."

"Oh, don't get all mushy." Rui screwed up her face. "Just have a nice conversation with your friend and leave when you're ready. I will stay here to lock the door after you go."

It made me uneasy to see how we were keeping Len and Miku locked away like prisoners. They were victims. Granted they had violent outbursts and had done horrible things, but they were still victims. Seeing the little compassion Tonio and the others had for my friend and this girl, it made me wonder just how better they were than the Streamers.

"So it I wasn't just imagining things when I saw you and Rin taking Miku and me down," was how Len greeted me when I entered the cell and the door slammed behind me. "How did you get involved, Nero?"

"Long story," is the only explanation I give. Len was shackled to his steel frame bed, and his hands were cuffed. The only thing in this room that could be used to entertain himself are old books, one of which Len set down as I entered. Other than the bed and novels, nothing else decorated the cage Len was locked within. There wasn't even a chair in which I could sit on as I communicated with my old friend.

"How's Rin?" Len asked, his facial features falling. "I've been asking and asking to see her, but I haven't heard anything concerning my sister."

Uncomfortable, I figured out how to tell Len what he didn't want to hear. "Rin's fine. Honest, she is. Well, as fine as one could be given the situation." Len nods along, given me the chance to say everything I needed to say before he interrupted me. "She's heard that you've been asking for her, and she's even been encouraged to speak with you, but she . . . doesn't want to talk to you right now."

"Why not?" Len asked. He didn't seem angry or irritated, just hurt. "I want to speak with her. Why doesn't she want to do the same? After everything, certainly she wouldn't want to avoid me." Len took a moment to think it all through. "Is this because of what happened with Kaito and Meiko? Is she ashamed of me for . . . Is she ashamed of me for doing the very thing I constantly criticized her for?"

"Rin's ashamed, but not of you," I answered. "She believes that she failed you. All your lives she did everything she could to protect you, and she couldn't even do that. It's tearing her up."

Len stared at his hands, finding the words to respond with. "We managed for over nineteen years, and that in and of itself is impressive. I didn't want to think that Rin believed that we could keep this going without for suspicion for our entire lives. I shouldn't have left the burden for only her to bear. She never ceased to keep her eyes open, to do whatever it took to keep us both safe. I was the idiot who didn't take all this as seriously as I should have. If either of us, this is more my fault than hers. Actually, it's completely my fault." Looking me in the eyes, Len added, "Tell Rin that I don't blame her, that she has nothing to be ashamed of. I'm the one who should be, and am, ashamed."

With nothing to add to that conversation, I asked easily the dumbest question I ever asked. "How are you doing?"

Snorting, Len answered, "How does it look like I'm doing? I'm handcuffed, tied to a bed, and treated like a wild animal that will attack at any minute. Okay, that last one is my own doing, but is this extent really necessary? I'm still a civilized being. I could at least be given a fork to eat my dinner with. Eating with my fingers is a lot more embarrassing than I want to admit."

"I'll see what I can do," I promised. "Other than your . . . conditions, how are you doing? You know, mentally? I've heard some about the 'rehabilitation,' but even then I can't ever imagine living through it."

Len shrugged. "It was all the perfect example of classical conditioning, complete with negative reinforcement and positive punishment. It was maddening. You know we had to kill to get the constant, headache-inducing buzzing noise to fade and fade until it finally went away entirely."

My spine became iron. "You killed?!"

"Not people, thank God, but cute and innocent creatures like bunnies and kittens were not so lucky." Len shivered. "It was all training to make us less empathetic. The more I wanted to help myself – to make the buzzing go away – the less I had to be willing to not hurt the animals. If I could get to the point that I could kill a fluffy animal with little regret, how effortless it would be to hurt another person just for my own enjoyment."

All I could do was stare at Len. Again he looked at his hands. He rotated them back and forth, curled and uncurled his fingers, and put them down as if he couldn't bear to look at them. "Sometimes I still see the blood coated on my skin and caked under my nails," he said. "I don't regret it, not anymore, but it still haunts me. It's not that I'm no longer capable of being sympathetic, but I don't care about the consequences as much anymore. Good thing you guys found us when you did. I was almost about to take Miku and myself back there to finish 'rehabilitation.' Had to because they threatened Rin. I'm glad to know that she truly was safe the whole time, but without any way of knowing, I would have willingly damned Miku and myself just to keep Rin alive. I wouldn't have regretted that."

"Then maybe the 'rehabilitation' isn't as successful as you think," I pointed out. "You still cared enough about Rin to sacrifice yourself for her. It's rare to find someone who would willingly lay down his life for a loved one, even amongst Love Makers. Maybe you're not as far gone as you think you are."

For a minute, Len considered this. Then, "Thanks, Nero. I needed to hear that. When you go, can you tell Rin . . ." Len took a deep breath. "Would you please tell Rin that I'm sorry? Tell her that I blame myself more than I could ever blame her? Tell her that I love her and miss her so much? Please?"

He looked so broken, what else could I say? His face turned red and tears built up in his eyes. The longer Rin went without speaking with her brother, the more he broke. Whatever the Streamers did to him, I don't believe that it could ever change the feelings Len had that ran deep for his only sister.

"I'll tell her," I said.

Len sighed in relief. "Thank you," he replied.

 _Don't thank me yet,_ I thought. It would take more than that to convince Rin to speak with Len, and I wouldn't consider that visit a success unless I did so.

"What about Miku?" I asked. "I understand that you two went through all of this together, but you haven't mentioned her once. When that attack happened in the marketplace, you seemed pretty persistent in helping her. Now you don't seem to care enough about her to ask how she's doing."

Frowning, Len answered, "I don't know how I feel about her right now. I don't hate Miku, but I can't say she's my favorite person either. Maybe I'm just trying to forget everything about her right now, like if I forget everything that has happened since I met her, then life will go on as if none of it ever happened."

"You can't blame someone for something out of their control, Len."

"Of course not."

With nothing else left to say, I made my way out of the prison.

"Nero," Len called me.

I didn't turn around. "Yes, Len?"

"Thank you for being there for Rin. As strong as she is, I don't think there's much of this she could have done by herself. You really are the friend neither of us deserves."

What Len said circled around my head as I left without a word and closed the door behind me. To my surprise, Rin was also just leaving the room across from Len's. I didn't immediately understand why she was there. Zeito and Mikuo were gone, but Rui did stay in their place as she said she would. The small woman sat back, closed her eyes, and wore earphones, tuning the world around her completely out.

"Why were you . . . ?" I began, but the truth is I didn't know what I was trying to ask.

"She has no friends here," Rin replied, crossing her arms. Her tough demeanor was back, but I wasn't sure if it was for show or if talking to Miku helped Rin recover enough to act like herself again. "Mikuo won't meet her, but since I'm avoiding Len, I know I can't judge. As hard as this is for Len and me, it's even harder for Miku. Up until all of this began, she had a perfectly normal life. Now all of this happened one after another. It wouldn't be right to just pretend that she doesn't exist."

Rin had a point. All this time I worried about Len and tried to be there for Rin, yet I completely forgot about the person who was probably suffering the most. "How did she take meeting you?"

Smirking, Rin said, "Oh, we did not hit it off. Miku recognized me as the one who broke her and Kaito up, and Len definitely told her a lot about me. Needless to say, she's not my biggest fan." Rin held up her hands in a gesture that suggested how little she cared. "However, we're not total enemies or anything. Miku understands that it really was in her best interests that she and Kaito ended their relationship, but she didn't necessarily support the choices I made in the process. Either way, I think the conversation ended well. She doesn't hate me, but she doesn't trust me either. Good to see that she has some intelligence." Before I could say anything in reply, Rin's features softened as she asked, "How's Len?"

Extending an arm in an "after you" motion, I answered, "Let's walk and talk. I have enough to say to keep us occupied as we walk back to our rooms and begin getting dressed for dinner."

* * *

A lot had changed since the attack in the Love World pocket of which I lived. The life I previously lived now was nothing more than a distant memory. The only thing I knew of, the only thing I could think about, was the here and now.

It wasn't as if I had been gone for too long. It was just that so much had happened in such a short amount of time. Truly it's not the time that ages us, but the events.

The world around me changed. People I had known my whole life had changed. I changed.

My thoughts changed. My beliefs changed. My feelings changed.

Every aspect of my life was completely different from what it was before. No similarities existed. The worst part was I wouldn't turn back for anything. I was here now, and that's all that mattered to me.

* * *

When I first went to the community, I found the mass number of roses outside unnerving. After my weeks there, I learned to appreciate them. Even Rin showed interest in the flora, something I never would have expected from her.

Earlier that morning, she told me that she wanted to speak with me after breakfast. When we had finished eating, she told me to meet her in the rose garden in fifteen minutes. I did, naturally, and found her pulling a white rose down close enough for her to smell it.

"Why do you want to smell that particular rose?" I asked as I stood next to her. "There are literally hundreds of others you wouldn't have to reach as high for."

"It wouldn't have been worth it if it was too easy," Rin answered. She let the rose go, and it bounced back to its position higher up on the bush. For a while she didn't say anything, and then, "Thank you for helping me get my brother back, but now I think it's time you go."

"What?" I furrowed my brows.

"You need to leave," Rin said, her words more forced this time. "We did what we set out to do. Len's safe. That's all that matters."

"Really? Because I think everything that's going to follow is important, too."

"It doesn't involve you. None of this ever involved you." Rin shook her head. "The only reason I let you come with me was because I knew that I couldn't be alone in all this – I would never have had to courage if the only person I could depend on was myself, but now I have my brother again. You're not needed anymore."

"Don't I get a say in this?" I asked. "What if I want to be here?"

"Why would you want to be here?!" Rin snapped. "Life from here on out is going to involve danger at every turn. Len and I will never be safe again, and neither will you if you choose to remain with us. Go away and forget that either of us have ever existed. It's for the best."

"The best for who? Me, or you?"

Furrowing her brows, Rin answered, "The best for everyone. If you stay, you're just going to be surrounded by people who don't even want you there."

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Are you implying that you don't even want me here?"

"Didn't I just tell you that the only reason I kept you around was so I wouldn't feel lonely while Len was missing? Now that I have my brother back, I have no need of you anymore."

"Rin," I chocked on her name, "what about the conversations we had? Didn't we connect with each other? Didn't we grow closer together? I thought we were friends."

"Nero, you seem to forget often that I was raised to be a Love Wrecker. We Love Wreckers don't have friends, and that means I don't think of you as my friend. You're just another face to forget."

My chest ached. Why was she saying stuff like that? "Look me in the eyes and tell me that," I ordered.

Shocked, Rin turned around and stared at me, her eyes wide. She hadn't looked at me once since I walked outside. If I was going to believe her, she would have to tell me everything she just did all the while maintaining eye contact with me.

"If you really mean it," I said slowly, "you should have no problem repeating those words as you look at me. I know what your lying face looks like, so now show me your honest one."

Rin's eyes clouded with forming tears. She blinked back the liquid before glaring at me with slits. For a moment all she did was stare at me like she wanted to hurt me, and then her features softened. Appearing the most genuine I have ever seen her, Rin looked at me dead in the eyes and said, "I can't be around you. Not anymore. All I want is for you to go as far away from here, as far away from me, as you can. I can't stand to be this close to you, not when-" Rin cut herself off. She shook her head and repeated, "I don't want you here. Now go."

I didn't want to believe I heard her right, but I couldn't ask her to repeat her words. There was no way I could handle the rejection if I kept asking Rin to lay it on so thickly.

"I understand," I said even though I didn't understand at all. "How soon do you want me gone?"

The reply I hoped for was "tonight," but the one she actually gave was "Now would be an excellent time." As much as I wanted to argue, I knew it was pointless. With a sigh, I told her that I would gather my belongings – AKA, the clothes on my back when I first went there – and I would leave as soon as possible.

Neither of us had anticipated that our enemies would choose just then to attack.

I feel the fire in my shoulder before I hear the loud thunder that echoed around us. Gasping, I gripped my shoulder in pain and was shocked to feel moisture. When I pulled my hand away, my worst suspicion proved to be reality. Blood. I was bleeding.

"Run, you idiot!" Rin screamed as she locked arms with me and practically dragged me back to the front door. More gunshots rang out. With a cry, Rin fell to the ground.

There was no time to think. I scooped Rin up and carried her inside, all the while ignoring the excruciating pain in my shoulder. Once inside, I used my back to slam the door shut, which made my shoulder further scream in agony, and shouted, "We're under attack!"

Thankfully, Mikuo happened to be walking by and witnessed Rin's and my dramatic entrance. Without hesitation, Mikuo ran to the other side of the hall and flipped a switch I always assumed controlled the light in another room. However, flipping the switch revealed something similar to a fire alarm, and Mikuo was quick to pull it.

The walls turned red with the flashing lights. A blaring siren rang inside my very skull. Rin struggled in my arms.

"Put me down," she said. I did as she requested, but Rin instantly cried out and clutched her calf. Blood poured from the gunshot wound.

"You can't walk," I gasped.

"Yes, I can," Rin argued, teeth gritted.

"I don't care how, but you two need to move now," Mikuo ordered. "Follow me." He didn't wait. Dude just bolted.

When dragging Rin along proved futile - she was in far too much pain to put weight on her leg - I picked her back up despite her protests and chased after Mikuo. "Where are we going?!" I shouted at him.

"Out of here!" he replied, saying nothing more. Good enough for me.

It didn't take me long to realize that the twisting paths we were going through lead to where Miku and Len were locked up. When we arrived, Zeito and Rui were already leading out Len and Miku, respectively. In the center of the room, a pocket portal was charging.

"RIN!" Len yelled upon seeing his sister in my arms. He tried to run towards us, but Zeito held him back.

"You can check on her when we get to where we're going," Zeito said, struggling to keep the blond in place.

"I'm fine, Len," Rin said as she pushed herself out of my arms for the second time. She winced when she again stood on her injured leg, but she held herself up regardless.

The place shook and thundered, the vibrations forcing me to wobble where I stood. We all looked at each other, knowing exactly what just happened. No locked door could ever stand up to a bomb.

"Where's everyone else?" I asked.

"Probably doing what we're doing," Rui answered. "Getting the hell out of here." She glared at the portal. "Except this device is taking too long."

"They'll catch us if we don't run soon!" Miku shouted, her eyes wild. Even Len looked terrified. They knew who was coming, and neither of them were eager for that reunion.

"I can't make the portal charge faster," Rui growled.

"But we can make them take longer to arrive," I gasped. Rin shot her heads toward me. I didn't think this through. I acted.

Running back to where we came, I pulled out the knife I hid in my boot. There was no way I could stop them, but I could at least slow them down. If that was all it took to save my friends, then that was enough.

Really, it all happened too fast for me to recall the exact details. First I was taking Love Wreckers down left and right, then I was struggling with a burly one, and then he pinned me to the floor as he held my own knife against my neck. Before he could finish me off, however, a hole suddenly appeared on the center of his head, blood flying out, and he fell over lifeless.

"Don't ever pull a stunt like that again!" Rin hissed as she ran towards me, a large limp in her steps. Her calf still bled. It reminded me of the pain in my shoulder. Everything began to hurt.

"I had to buy everyone time," I said as I sat up and reached for my weapon. "I had to buy you time, yet here you are."

"Idiot," Rin snarled. "I'm not leaving you. Not in a situation such as this."

We couldn't argue. Soon more Love Wreckers would appear, and even with a gun, there was no possibility Rin and I could fend them all off. All I could do was hope that the portal was ready.

"Let's head back," I suggested. The trip there was more anxiety-inducing the second time around. Now that I've experienced first hand what we were up against, I knew exactly the type of threat we had over our heads.

It was as Rui literally pushed the reluctant Len into the portal that we returned. "Good, now I don't have to look for you two," she said, panting. "Don't hesitate. Just jump."

"But what if they follow us?" Rin asked.

The question caught Rui off guard. All she could do was shake her head and answer, "Let's just hope they don't." Then she disappeared.

Rin and I glanced at each other before we made to follow Rui's example. The problem was we were interrupted in the process.

My jaw slammed into the hard floor after a large forced knocked me over. "Where do you think you're going, pretty boy?"

It was Rin's defiant screams that told me we weren't alone anymore. My head was forced upwards so that I could witness Rin fighting a Love Wrecker woman with salt and pepper hair. "Let's watch her die, shall we?" the man on top of me said. Needless to say, I didn't agree with him.

Gun knocked out of her hand, Rin had to use physical combat to defend herself. Too bad her attacker was skilled and Rin injured. Most of the fight was the female Love Wrecker punching Rin as Rin held her guard up to protect her face. Then so quickly that I almost didn't process it, the woman pulled out a grenade.

"RIN!" With the power I never knew I had, I pushed the man off of me, bolted towards the threat, and tackled the woman. I didn't stop her from throwing the grenade, but my actions did prompt Rin to get out of the way.

Only Rin wasn't fast enough.

The grenade exploded on one of the doors, and the debris shot towards Rin. She cried out as the particles pierced her, cutting her in every area of exposed skin. Shaking, Rin covered her eye with one hand. I almost vomited to see blood seeping through her fingers.

"That's it," said the first voice. I turned to see the other Love Wrecker, a man with silver hair and mismatched eyes, aiming his gun at me. He snarled. "You die now."

Acting purely on instinct, I looked for an escape. I saw Rin's gun just a mere yard away and lunged for it. The man panicked and yanked his gun back on me. A gunshot rang out, and the man fell over.

I didn't stop to see if he was dead. As the woman charged at me, I turned the weapon on her and fired. She, too, fell.

My next concern was Rin.

Still covering her bleeding eye, Rin sobbed as she watched me. "Are they dead?" she asked, remaining good eye scanning the bodies.

Not taking the proper amount of time to do an actual analysis, I scanned the bodies for a total of three seconds for signs of life. "They're dead," I pronounced, hoping the words to be true. I rushed to Rin's side. "We need to go now so you can have someone look at your eye."

"I don't even know if I still have an eye," Rin mumbled. She sobbed again, a hiccup passing her lips. There was nothing I could say to comfort her.

"Either way, you need medical attention." As I lead her to the portal, approaching footsteps grew louder as their owners came closer. We were lucky enough to fight and survive the two Love Wreckers, but I wasn't willing to test that luck again. "Hurry," I muttered as I began dragging Rin.

The good news: There was enough time to enter the portal before they arrived to finish us off.

The bad news: The portal was already closing, the self-destruct mechanism following after the closure.

Rin swore. "It's too small already for us both to go. We're not going to make it."

"We're not," I agreed, "but you are."

"What the-" Rin stopped when I pulled her into a hug. "Nero, what are you-"

My voice raising with excitement, I interrupted Rin so that I could get the words out as quickly as possible. "I love you, Rin. I'm so very, deeply in love with you. God, I love you so much it hurts me. I know you could never feel the same, but I wanted you to know. There's no way I could do this without telling you first."

I didn't give Rin even a second to react. Pulling her away, I pushed her into the portal just as it reached the smallest possible size to travel through. As she vanished away, I could see her reaching out for me as she called my name.

Then she was no more.

There wasn't time to sigh before the Love Wreckers found me. "My, my," the leader of this group said. "What do we have here?"

* * *

Nero frantically waves his hands in the air. "I thought I was a goner! 'This is it,' I told myself. 'This is the end. I'll never know if they will make it out all right, and worst of all, I'll never see Rin again.' I prepared myself for immediate death, but then-!"

The man silences Nero by raising his hand to signal Stop. "That will be enough, Mr. Akita," the man says.

"But I'm not finished." Nero frowns. "I thought you wanted to hear everything."

"What I want is to leave here and begin using my vacation days." The man rubs his temples. "I finally interview someone who's cooperative, and I'm ready to send him out when he's still so eager to talk. That's how I know how long this day has been."

"Want me to get you some coffee?" Nero offers. He points his thumb at the door behind him and says, "They have been serving us coffee all day. I have to say, it's really good coffee. I've had four mugs already."

"That explains your energy." The man gathers his documents. "That will be all, Mr. Akita. Why don't you send Ms. Kagamine back here for me? I need to discuss things with her further."

"Sure thing." As Nero's fingers graze the doorknob, the man calls his name. "Yes?"

Pinching his forehead, the man replies, "When you have Ms. Kagamine come this way, could you have her take a mug of coffee with her? I'm going to need all the help I can get with her second interview."

 **End of**

 **The Love Vanishing Diaries**

 **Book IV**


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